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Funny Children's Bible Stories
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LOTS WIFE.
The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot 's wife
looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason
interrupted, 'My Mommy looked back once while she was driving,' he
announced triumphantly, 'and she turned into a telephone pole!'
GOOD SAMARITAN
A Sunday school teacher was
telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan. She asked the class,
'If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding,
what would you do?' A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence,
'I think I'd throw up..'
DID NOAH FISH?
A Sunday school teacher
asked, 'Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on
the Ark ? ''No,' replied Johnny. 'How could he, with just two worms.'
HIGHER POWER
A Sunday school teacher said
to her children, 'We have been learning how powerful kings and queens
were in Bible times. But, there is a Higher Power. Can anybody tell me
what it is? One child blurted out, ' Aces!'
MOSES AND THE RED SEA
Nine-year-old Joey was asked
by his mother what he had learned in Sunday School. 'Well, Mom, our
teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue
mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt . When he got to the Red Sea
, he had his army build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked
across safely. Then he radioed headquarters for reinforcements. They
sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved.'
'Now, Joey, is that really
what your teacher taught you?' his Mother asked.
'Well, no, Mom. But, if I
told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!'
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
A Sunday School teacher
decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages
in the Bible - Psalm 23. She gave the youngsters a month to learn the
chapter. Little Rick was excited about the task - but he just couldn't
remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past the
first line.
On the day that the kids
were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Ricky
was so nervous. When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone
and said proudly, 'The Lord is my Shepherd, and that's all I need to
know.'
UNANSWERED PRAYER
The preacher's 5 year-old
daughter noticed that her father always paused and bowed his head for a
moment before starting his sermon. One day, she asked him why.
'Well, Honey,' he began,
proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages. 'I'm asking
the Lord to help me preach a good sermon.'
'How come He doesn't answer
it?' she asked.
UNTIMELY ANSWERED PRAYER
During the minister's prayer
one Sunday, there was a loud whistle from one of the back pews. Tommy's
mother was horrified. She pinched him into silence and, after church,
asked, 'Tommy, whatever made you do such a thing?'
Tommy answered soberly, 'I
asked God to teach me to whistle, and He did!'
ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS
When my daughter, Kelli,
said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every family member, every
friend, and every animal (current and past). For several weeks, after we
had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli would say, 'And all girls.' This
soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing. My
curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, 'Kelli, why do you always
add the part about all girls?'
Her response, 'Because
everybody always finish their prayers by saying 'All Men'!'
SAY A PRAYER
Little Johnny and his family
were having Sunday dinner at his Grandmother's house. Everyone was
seated around the table as the food was being served. When Little Johnny
received his plate, he started eating right away.
'Johnny! Please wait until
we say our prayer.' said his mother.
'I don't need to,' the boy
replied.
'Of course, you do.' his
mother insisted. 'We always say a prayer before eating at our house.'
'That's at our house.'
Johnny explained. 'But this is Grandma's house and she knows how to
cook!'
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